Lonely late night Beach Boys blogging.

Stand up comedian. Based in Portland, Oregon. Will work for attention.

For booking and other inquires Email me

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me

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YOU’LL NEVER FUCKING BELIEVE WHAT I FOUND IN THE FOREST!!!!

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The Beginning Of A Story I Never Finished

From page 197 of High-Hanging Fruit:

‘He unlaced his cowslamb stepping-shoes with an intensity seldom reserved for slip-ons. She knew...

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coca-cola:

The Loch Ness Monster was first sighted today in 1933. People think Nessie was a menacing creature… but, really, she was a thirsty one.

When you guys are like,...

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Me and my mom. I like to forget about my teens.

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jakefogelnest:

33 years ago today, my friend Henry was REALLY stressed out.

You wanna see helicopters?

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We all love Chewbacca because we all wish our dog or cat was big enough to hug us and help drive our car.

If I could yell “Punch it!” to my cat as we merged onto a freeway —...

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Photo via danforth

I look like a lone gunman in this photo. Well, that’s one day without smoking for you.

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jordanmorris:

jessethorn:

Jordan, Jesse, Go! is coming to the Edinburgh Fringe this August. One night only: 8/22/13. Tickets on sale now.

Get em guys.

This is...

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